ble dh blurr...

ntah npe dunia ak kini mkin blur....
ak makin hilang pedoman diri..
ak makin hilang keyakinan dan pegangan yang slama nie teguh dlm diri ak..
ak dh jd mcm budak bodoh lak..
ak pegi kelas ari2 tp xtau pe yg ak blajar..
ak cm mendengar dgn penuh tekun nye tp xde satu pon yg melekat kt dlm kpala..
ble balik kelas...ak cm lost pe yg ak blajar....
pas2 ble lecturer bg assgnment...
ak lpe...nk wt..
then ak jd cm hampeh...
org lain punyer la byk keje...ak bleh je duk relax2 ats katil..
ble org tanyer.."xde keje ker?"..
ak leh la ckp..ak rse ak de byk assgnment kene wt..tp ak xtau ape die asgnment 2...
yg lagi sengal nyer..ak xde pulak berusaha tanye classmate ak..ader keje kene wt x..
ak cm lara jek..
ntah pe yg merasuk ak...
ak pon xtau..
yg ak tau.. ari2 yg ak lalui kini makin menjahanamkan ak....
ak makin jauh dari aper yg ak impikan ....
tp pelik ble ak rase hidup ak lebih bahagia begini....
adakah sbb ak xperlu memikirkan pe2 yg membebankn ak..
atau sebenarnyer ader yg xkene dgn diri ak..
ak xtau..
sometime i feel like want to give up in my life..
i am not strong enough to pretend that nothing is wrong
when actually, all the thing goes wrong...
ohhh, sometime its just killing me inside..

ak perlu mencari identiti ak balik..
perlu balik ke pangkal jln..
tp ak xtau dimana ak harus bermula..
tiada siapa yg ingin membimbing..
tiada siapa yg amek peduli..
ak bertanggungjawab atas diriku kini..
aahhhh....
its make me like crazy...